You are perfect just as you are!
I clearly remember so many times….
Thinking about a place or event I’d be going to. “What version of me should I bring?” I would ponder. I behaved as if I had a closet full of masks and I was to choose the right one for the occasion. I would then imagine myself “acting” however it was that I decided was best.
Planning. Imagining. Deciding.
Or at times I would be with people, at an event, party or gathering. I’d be outside of myself, observing, and wonder, “Is this good? Do they like me? Am I doing ok?”
Watching. Evaluating. Deciding.
We spend so much time and energy deciding and changing who we are and how we show up, usually subconsciously. We create stories in our mind of what people expect or will like. We think about what persona or behavior will have the effect that we want on the people or situation. It is exhausting.
As you read this, what comes to your mind? Do you relate? Can you recall times when you didn’t act or feel like yourself, or worse, sacrificed your values for another?
My invitation to you is to give this up. It takes practice as it is so ingrained that we often are not aware. But like all habits, we can break bad ones and create new ones if we are committed.
When I catch myself being less than my authentic self (because I still do), I ask, “What if you are just you, Jen?” And I realize that I never need to be anything else.
Who you are is 100% perfection, nothing less.
There is nothing about you that needs to change.
You are not broken, and nothing needs to be fixed. If someone doesn’t like who you are, it is not your problem and it has nothing to do with you. It is them.
Most of the time, what you think people want is inaccurate. Other people are not sitting around thinking about how they want you to act. They want you to be real and true. Isn’t that what you want from the people in your life?
Who you are is love.
You are the energy of love and if you are true to yourself, you will be kind and compassionate as others will be to you if they are authentic. Don’t cover that up.
We are not inherently nasty or mean. These are protections based out of fear. If you feel any of these or find yourself not being nice, stop and connect back into your true self and your energy will shift. Focus on you and who you are deep inside and the fear that drives this behavior will subside.
You don’t need a costume. Stop judging yourself, stop guarding, stop being a victim. Just be your perfect you and with that there will be no need for anxiety or sadness.
What the world needs right now is for everybody to show up
as their authentic self and be the love that they are.
